i do want to retire this blog i think, but having no other available private space i need to take it right now.

feeling all fucked up and crazy, avoided a queer relationship getting deep into feelings for so long, maybe cuz i can’t deal with the intensity,

two witches fucking in a house together,

we argued slept separately then woke the next morning  both with bumps on our heads, scratches on my chest but we didn’t touch each other

my life is a series of my life is a series of my life is a series of loves a series of distractions a series of unexplainable phenomena science fiction a series of beautiful nightmares a series of secret messages transmitted from ur brain to mine, neither of us meant to but

i’m scared of the storm. i can’t be accountable to anybody. the few people i love enough to fight with. might leave me if we fight. might not love me enough to fight back.

walls don’t protect u they only keep u trapped. i was trusting the wrong people. the people like me in my real physical space too hard to trust, then my girl was like maybe you can’t trust her because u can’t trust urself.

oh right.

i know i am not to be trusted, locked out locked up drugged up interventions restraints forced tranquilizers one more bad decision

i don’t mean to be all doom and gloom everytime i write something but shit is crazy, i have to say it so i don’t gget too crazy

scared to be close with people cuz every relationship gets abusive and i don’t know how to stop it, best i can do is be honest i’m fucked up and crazy never said i wasnt